Chapter Six - Lessons Learned

thought of punishment, and [so] he who is afraid has not reached the full maturity of love [is not yet grown into love’s complete perfection]. (1 Jo 4:18). (Want Amplified)

This scripture is the summation of Joy’s mentoring me. She taught me how to love. Her love matured me, brought down my walls of distrust, made it safe for me to grow up, and most importantly, to pass on this life to my husband, my children, my loved ones, and all those whose paths I cross.

Joy lived a life of love and passed it on to her family. Now I do the same for my four beautiful children. I’ve made more mistakes than I ever thought I would or wanted to, but I love my children no matter what. Joy’s love in action won her children to Jesus. There’s nothing I can say to evangelize my children. I simply love them.

In Saint Theresa of Avila’s book, The Way of Perfection, she believed that someone who truly loves in spirit doesn’t really care whether they receive the affection of another or not. Love’s essence is to love others for their spiritual profit, not for our own comfort or benefit. When we love in this way, we are happier to give than to receive, even in our relationship with the Creator Himself. What Saint Theresa described is holy affection. It is the only thing deserving its high and holy name: “love.” As Joy said to me so many years ago, “Honey, I will love you, no matter what.”

Personal Process Assessment

More is caught than taught. Catching what you see is an integral part of the learning process. What do you see in your friend what you want to catch? What do you see in your friend that you have and want to pass on?

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